Recently I had a discussion with one of my friends about this page. She suggested “You should change your blog to List and Describe 5 things if that is what you want,” which brought up a good point I have yet to address. This is a totally interactive site so you are allowed to answer however you want, including simply listing 5 items; however, what will truly differentiate your answer from others is the personal stories behind them. Why do you feel that way? What made you choose that certain thing? Obviously, my entries will be a little longer than most, and not everyone will feel the need to open up quite as much. It doesn’t matter. Make your list however you are compelled to, since it is yours not mine. Speaking of which…
Wikipedia defines a guilty pleasure as “something one considers pleasurable despite feeling guilt for enjoying it,” which means that this must be the definition (Wikipedia is infallible after all). So here are mine:
- The Hills reality television show on MTV – It is so terrible and obviously staged, yet I can’t seem to tear myself away from it. There are literally moments where they sit there and stare at each other in silence. GOOD TV THIS DOES NOT MAKE. It approached guilty pleasure status when I started judging people by how they felt about the show. When my friend Katie was trying to explain to me what it was like being around our mutual friend and her beau, she simply revealed “They sided with Heidi and Spencer.” Not only did I immediately know what Katie was referring to, I also understood our friend’s relationship better then than I had through the previous 10 minutes of actual conversation. What cemented the status of guilty pleasure was when I was at my sister’s house and asked if we could watch the Hills. At this point my 14 year-old niece gave me an incredulous look and queried “YOU watch the HILLS?” This was right before she pointed and laughed at me in what can only be described as a mocking tone.
- Cyber-Stalking – From searching for you on facebook to browsing your list of friends with public profiles on myspace, cyber-stalking is a habit I can’t shake. What’s more is that I rather enjoy doing it. Voyeurism isn’t the the main reason I am drawn to this guilty pleasure (though it does have some appeal), rather I enjoy the thrill of finding things. Each time I discover something about someone I am searching for online it’s like a little gold strike, and for me it’s these little victories that make life worth living. Additionally, it is a good way to keep up with friends you don’t talk to anymore, as well as making sure they are still alive by looking at the last time they had activity. Even so, the most gratifying thing about my cyber-stalking is the information factor. When I moved to California there was a perfect example of this. Whenever I was introduced to new people I would immediately look them up on various social networks as soon as I walked in the door of the apartment upon arriving home. In one instance in particular, my friend Chad and I went out for drinks with a couple of girls we had met out somewhere. The next day I scoured the Internet trying to find any information on these two that I could. Even though I didn’t know their last names at the time, I was able to successfully find facebook and myspace pages for both of them. At this point I obviously sent the links to Chad while he was at work. Not only was he not in the least bit shocked that I had been able to find them, but he remarked “I wondered how long it would take you to find them.” Please understand that I didn’t actually extend a friend request to them until we brought up the topic in normal conversation, but I had already seen all of their pictures and enough about them to know that we would probably get along. Do I think that this behavior is a little creepy? Of course I do, because people can also cyber-stalk me; however, if you have a public blog don’t be surprised if I read the whole thing and reference it during our conversation. Sometimes I just can’t help myself.
- Soulja Boy’s Music – Despite agreeing with most of what rap pioneer Ice T had to say in his explicit laden rant, I can’t help liking Soulja Boy’s songs. Don’t get me wrong, in no way is he as lyrically talented as say Andre 3000 of Outkast fame (he’s about the worst lyricist that I have heard actually), but I’ll be damned if I don’t find myself bobbing my head to the beat, repeating some banal hook, attempting to do a series of ridiculous dance moves by the end of the first chorus. Even if you despise rap music you will be hard pressed to not crack a smile while watching one of the thousands of you tube copycats doing the Superman dance. Personally, a few friends and I devoted an entire day to learning the moves (by watching an instructional video on you tube no less) culminating in a very “spirited” performance later that night. What draws me to this music is both the absurdity and novelty of it. It’s absurd to think a high school kid can string together some nonsensical phrases and have people doing it everywhere from Division 1 football games to dance classes for children. In regards to the novelty, like so many talentless rap pioneers before him, it will eventually wear off. It reminds me of listening to Afroman in college and laughing with my circle of friends at how silly his songs were. Yet, we would play them religiously and were excited when one of us moved close to Afroman’s beloved Palmdale, CA. This is the same kind of joy that I also got in the late 80’s from listening to the Fat Boys. Hopefully Soulja Boy will do a remake of the Disorderlies before his novelty wears off. One can only hope.
- Dora the Explorer – Okay, first of all let me clear up a few common misconceptions people have when they find out that this is one of my guilty pleasures. No I don’t have any children of my own, no I am not around children on a regular enough basis to have a legitimate argument for liking the show, yes of course I realize that it’s a show for children, and no I am not a pedophile (even though I became infatuated with Natalie Portman when she was only 12. SHUT YOUR FACE! I was only 14 at the time). My fascination started when I was at an outdoor art fair with my friends Jamie, Jennifer, and Jennifer’s three children. As we were leaving, someone found these little pink Dora the Explorer sunglasses on the ground. Since either none of the kids wanted them or because I didn’t offer to let the kids have them (probably the latter) I kept them for myself. The rationale behind it is that I love the color pink (possibly another guilty pleasure) and they looked pretty funny on my face. That’s it. That’s the entire story of how I got hooked on Dora. Once I had these tiny little kid sunglasses, I had to show them off to my friends on every occasion that I could. The more I showed them off, the more attached I became with the character. When it came time to decorate for Katie and Sara’s Christmas party, I thought It would be hilarious to wrap the door with Dora giftwrap. They allowed me to go shopping with them so I picked out disposable Dora plates, so now at this gathering of twenty-somethings, there was a prevailing theme of Christmas cheer brought to you by Dora and Boots. Possibly the most remarkable part about this guilty pleasure is that I haven’t actually ever seen a full episode of the show. Seriously. Not even once.
- York Peppermint Patties – It’s not the fact that I like them that makes it a guilty pleasure, it’s the fact that I routinely eat a huge bagful of them in one sitting. Ideally, I’d eat them after they have been left in the freezer for long enough to harden and with a big glass of milk; however, this is not very likely to happen since I am lactose intolerant and try my best to stay away from milk. These are such a guilty pleasure of mine that I recently lived off of a diet consisting primarily of York and Bud Light. I would say that’s what I had for no less than 80% of my weekly meals. It was much better than you probably think it would be, that is unless you think it would be one of the best things ever. Which it was.
So what are yours? Remember that there are no wrong answers, only ones that I will judge you by. Just kidding. Kind of. List 5 of your guiltiest guilty pleasures.